The BEST update ever?

Thanks for all your good wishes.
B"H I had a baby girl Purim time.

14 w 4d

B"H, all appears to be well. We had a tough first 12 weeks, which included a trip to ER and major panic over HCG numbers. Still, everything measured ok at 12 weeks and so here we are at 14 weeks and 4 days.

We're not doing any testing, so the next big appointment is not until the 20 weeks scan. I hope my anxiety levels don't increase. I'm finding it hard, as most of the classic pregnancy symptoms have gone, and I'm sitting here wondering if the baby is still growing. The IVF clinic spoilt us by doing a scan every 2 weeks for 8 weeks. It was amazing to see him/her growing, sucking their thumb, kicking their legs. It's something I miss so much.

The OB wants me to see a psychologist about the anxiety. I don't feel it's needed, and given that it's fuel by factors that I can't control (something happening to the baby, my marriage, financial worries), I'm not sure its worth me schlepping miles on the bus to see one.

The little embryo that could?

Went to my GP yesterday to have my HCG levels checked. B"H, they'd increased from 139 on Wednesday to 1125 on Sunday.

Nice increase, but low numbers for 5 weeks pregnant.

Thanks for all your comments. Ultrasound scheduled for Wednesday, so we'll see how the bean is progressing.

What was I thinking?

I'd actually begun to think that I might be having a baby. You know, just like all those other women I see on my block, in shul, in the store. I was going to be like any other frum woman around here. Busy with her kids, kvetching about school fees, being like a typical frummy mommy.

Yesterdays beta was low. I had only gone from 37 to 149 in a week. The ultrasound did show implantation, and the blob we saw on screen was measuring at 4 weeks 4 days, which is only one day less than it should be.

I asked the clinic to repeat the bloodwork tomorrow, but they refused. I have to wait until next wednesday for a follow up appointment.

Just how I'll get through this week, I don't know. I'm sick of waiting for results, waiting for my life to start, waiting for my husband to finally grow up and be an adult. I'm sick of waiting to be happy.

What a difference a day makes

The final beta showed that the numbers had more than doubled, which I guess means I'm, well,um,

PREGNANT!!!!!

3 out of 3

Used the 3rd and final pregnancy test.

Negative.

Final beta tomorrow.

Another waste of time and money

11dpo- finally caved in and bought a home pregnancy test. 3 in fact, at a cost of $20 that I really can't spare.

Of course, I got my usual one line negative reading.

I keep trying to convince myself it's way to early. But a negative with no pregnancy symptoms doesn't point to a happy ending.

Second beta is on Thursday. The first blood test was this morning, but the clinic won't give out results until the second test. We'll have to wait and see.